Fall Update: A much needed break

Have you ever specifically put aside time to do absolutely nothing? No? That's probably because you've never had to.

I think it's very easy to get caught up in your every day life. . .before you know it days, weeks, months, and years have past and you look back with no idea how it all happened so fast. This weekend in particular I decided that I was going to  make myself so busy with doing nothing just to get caught up. Instead of going out or traveling to visit people I spent most of my time indoors with J. . .

Aside from a quick brunch bite outside, we stayed in and that was exactly what I needed. It's cuffing season, after all.

PS - For a picture-by-picture view of what goes on in my life, follow me on Instagram (Carrymel). It's like my 3rd social media love. Pinterest is obviously my first.

Proud Lady-Child

I came across an article in the bible that pretty much hit the nail on the head for me. It talks about exactly how I've been feeling over the past few months...or basically since I turned 18. Let's just call it what it is: the past 5 years.

Since going through two moves, getting a full-time job, taking on my very own bills yet still relying on older, "wiser", and more experienced folks for some financial assistance I have come to terms with exactly where I am in life. I understand that I am not a girl, not a teen, definitely a 20-something female, but am I a woman? I feel like something should have happened to trigger my grown-ass woman realization. Maybe it will happen when I get married? Maybe when I have my first child? Right now though...not quite there yet.

You might have Lady-Child Syndrome if...

- As much as you might think you know what you're planning on doing with your career, you still have no idea. You have a degree, you have a job...yet you haven't completely ruled out being an astronaut or professional food taster.

- Traveling, of any kind, is an adventure to you. In fact, anything super-stable that may prevent you from doing that is seen as "holding you back". Can I live?

- Continuing your education is a way of prolonging being a student. Just admit it.

- Everyone around you is either getting married or having children. Everydamnbody. Even the ones who you just knew would never find love.

- The idea of having children or getting married is just about as scary as the thought of being kicked off your family's cell phone plan. So in a nutshell, there go your priorities.

- You'd prefer to be referred to as "an emerging adult" or a "woman-in-training".

This would explain why I love the hell out of shows like Girls, 2 Broke Girls, and New Girl...also, the fact that all three of those shows have "girl" in the titles is just a weird coincidence that I just now noticed while typing this.

I'm not complaining though. I'm still a very responsible young adult who is enjoying her youth but thinking about the future. I am in absolutely no rush for full-on adult problems. Am I using this "lady-child" syndrome as a crutch? Perhaps. But some of the things I've listed above don't apply to me as much as they used to and I'm starting to move past them. One bad-decision-turned-moral-lesson at a time.

Talking about my Generation

Two weeks ago my boyfriend graduated college and I couldn't be happier for him. Partially because it was high time he graduated that mofo, but mostly because he was ready to take that next step and it's an exciting time. I can admit that this time last year I was slightly envious of him. Yes, I was done with school but I wasn't going on to "bigger and better things". Not immediately, anyway. He still had his college security blanket, his close friends living a few feet away from him, and I was mentally preparing myself to go back to La Madre.

In fact, my bf wasn't the only person I was close to who was staying in school. I felt like everyone had an extra semester or year tucked away somewhere, and I couldn't wrap my head around it. But then something  happened. The summer ended, I found a way to move out on my own, got a job within my field and I never looked back. It doesn't happen all the time, but it does happen, folks.

Now that some of my closer friends have graduated (at last) I'm extremely proud of them, not only because of what they've accomplished but because their attitude after graduating is way more optimistic than mine was. I'm generally a happy-go-lucky kind of person, but even I can admit that post-grad life scared me. The 20-something's I've talked to about their recent graduations don't all have jobs lined up but they're prepared to work and market themselves. I think in a lot of ways this generation of young adults is thought to be self-concerned (true), self-centered (true), self-entitled (very true), but we can also be self-sufficient. There's no shame in going back home if you're working hard to get out, and if you're temporarily unemployed just remember that it's only temporary.

My best advice to grads who have failed to realize the above is this: stop looking for a hand out. No one owes you a damn thing. You've made it this far, so keep the momentum going.

Bring on the sunshine

Apparently, it's supposed to be nearly 90 degrees tomorrow in New York, and I could not be happier. The spring is my favorite time of the year because the weather's perfect...most of the time. And this time around? It's practically summer ;)

I suppose you want an explanation for my whereabouts? If I could pinpoint a place, I'd be glad to share but I honestly don't know. It's already mid-April and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it not being March anymore. Where did the time go?

This time last year I was stressing out about finishing my thesis in time for graduation. My biggest concern was what I'd be spending my three months off during the summer doing. Those summer vacay days are long over *sigh*.

However, even though I'm no longer a college student and I have no intentions of going on to become a teacher  and get those summer vacation days back, I do plan on enjoying my spring and later, my summer. 

My two year anniversary is coming up, as are a few trips, and my roommates and I looking for a new apartment (we've been here for almost a year! Crazy!). Instead of getting wrapped up in the daily happenings of my life though, I'll chronicle it here on this blog like I should have been doing this past month. 

In the meantime, while I promise to not forsake this blog in the immediate future, between posts you can certainly find me here (my newest obsession):

What have you all been up to?

March Madness

March has only just begun and I was already preparing myself for the inevitable malarkey coming my way since February 29th. It's not all bad though - February was the shortest yet most annoying month for me. Packages stolen, debit card fraud, missed opportunities . . if I were any other kind of person I'd be seriously depressed right now but what's the point?

One thing has helped lift my spirits: The Hunger Games. The book was suggested to me not because of the movie (which, btw, I have already made plans to pre-order tickets for), but because someone else who isn't to read thought I would like it. Oh, and do I ever.

Is it bad that I contemplated calling out of work this week so I could try to finish a book in one day? I don't think I've ever hated working more. If I were in college I'd just skip my class or call in sick. For some reason money isn't as important as finding out how a book ends to me. Someone needs to get her priorities in order.

Other weekday pick-me-uppers:

• Nice weather! It was nearly 70 degrees on Wednesday! You know what that means. . . I can wear my whore-ish clothes again :) Or not. Since it's still technically winter. But a girl can dream.

• A couple of friends who I haven't spoken to in a while actually reached out to me. Shout out to you if you know who you are ;)

• A new layout! Do ya like it? I'm going to go ahead and thank Courtney for doing it for me! I still have some small tweaks I want to make, that I'm too lazy to do right now but by Sunday we'll be good to go.

• Oh, and this: 

How has your week been going? Did this cupcake photo help?

Ways to keep busy when sick

When I get sick, my body has very predictable stages. It's been this way for as long as I can remember. It starts off with a scratchy through one morning when I wake up. I always think that immediately downing Emergen-C will help fight off anything more serious coming my way and without fail, I always don't have Emergen-C.

Because of consistent fail, the full-blown cold that follows usually lasts for two weeks (yes, TWO weeks) and I find ways to keep my mind off it. Such as, but not limited to...

• Purposeless online shopping. This weekend I bought a slave bracelet (why? Because I saw Vanessa Hudgen's wore it. Obviously.), a bedazzled iPhone case meant for someone 10 years my junior, as well as various things from Forever 21 and Urban Outfitters that I'm ashamed to go into detail on because they found the perfect time to prey on me. I was weak.

• Go outside and spread your illness. I was that person on the train who everyone looks at like they have the plague (sorry). Somehow Bath and Body Works convinced me to buy 6 lotions, sprays, and body washes! What is it about President's Day that makes people think sales are appropriate?

• Clean. I thought to myself, "How can I make my life easier for when I finally get better? Clean the entire apartment!" Am I the only one who makes epic plans for after they recover from a cold? In a way, a cold is your body's way of telling you to chill the f*ck out and stop messing with it.

• Work out. You'd be surprised how motivated you can get when you have a cold. I was trying to sweat out the cold (does that work?), and also tell myself that since my body was trying to get rid of germs, it certainly could get rid of a couple of those pesky calories. What, like it's hard?

• Make your significant other feel like their sole purpose is to nurse you back to health. J was out of the country or on some school-related trip in New York (same difference) so every chance I got I reminded him that it was his responsibility to take care of me and he was failing as a boyfriend. Dramatic? Yes, considering I was shopping, cleaning and going out like nobody's business.

• Read that book that's been sitting on your nightstand. This was part of me "bettering myself" so that once I felt better, I'd feel like I accomplished something.

I'm backwards. I get motivated to do more when I don't feel well and now that I'm 96% back to normal, I just want to lay on the couch and eat mini cupcakes.

Sometimes I get a feeling

American Horror Story is now on the top of my list of TV shows I need to come back for another season asap. Right up there with True Blood. I haven't been able to sleep at a decent hour for the past week because of a combination of fear and over-analyzing, but I do love the show.

And just as I start liking a worthy show. . . I'm sad to say that I'm excited for Bad Girls: Las Vegas. Did I mention I haven't had cable for months? Having it now is a big deal for me!

I'd like to blame my being MIA on reality TV (kind of like how we blame violence, stereotypes, sub-par reading comprehension, etc. on reality TV), but TV this time isn't the culprit. I can't with good conscious ever blame the media for my problems. Too easy.

What has really been happening is lots of work and me juggling my time between all of the people who are important to me. Of course, one of those people is my boyfriend who took me to see The Vow (and it wasn't incredibly sad. Just unfortunate) and is finishing his final semester of college. Wish him luck! I feel like it's been ages since I even sat in a classroom. How does that happen?

I keep feeling like everything's happening so fast, yet nothing's really happening. Or maybe I mean nothing's really happening to me? Not at the rate I want it to, anyway.

Which is why it's time to shake things up.

I work in baby steps, so don't expect a new tattoo or wild hair color or me jetting off to another country. But do expect me to enjoy my 20's a little more...For me to find the same joy in the things I found fun pre-graduation. Expect me to start taking better care of myself so I look the same way on the outside that I feel on the inside. Why should I wait until Spring for those good vibes to come?

And as for things YOU can actually see - keep a look out for a whole new blog makeover for Carrymel.blogspot.com ;)

PS - Follow me on Instagram: Carrymel

Would you or wouldn't you?

While out with some friends last week for dinner and drinks the conversation started off the way most female conversations do: from fashion to feelings to, inevitably, men and relationships. One girl brought up the topic of proposing to a man instead of waiting for him to propose to you. She gave the example of a friend she knew who did it recently, which completely caught her boyfriend off-guard. I'm all for being pro-active and speaking your mind, but for me a proposal from the person I love is step 1 towards us getting married. Maybe I'm old fashion or I've seen too many Disney movies (or both, actually), but if I have to propose to you I'll feel like I'm robbing myself of the beginning stages of my fairy tale wedding.

But that's neither here nor there, lol.

Those who agreed with the girl proposing - which was basically the same as a man's proposal, only you give him a nice watch *rolls eyes* - said that it wasn't about "giving in". It was about knowing what you want and taking it upon yourself to get it. When it was put that way, I understood where the girl was coming from. I still personally wouldn't do it, but if she knew that was the man she wanted, and that he felt the same - more power to her! From the sound of things, however, it didn't seem like the boyfriend was too fond of her taking his moment away, it's also possible that he didn't want to get married to begin with. . .

. . . See, this is why you wait for him to be ready. Ha!

Would you propose to your man? And guys, how would you feel about your girlfriend proposing to you? 

The NYC side is overtaking my Long Island side

I've lived in the city heavily populated city-like area of Astoria for what? 3 or 4 months now? Now, I am hardly an authentic NYC girl - in my mind I am, but I can face facts and admit that since my childhood was spent on Long Island and I only have a few months under my belt, I am still a Long Island girl at heart. A bridge and tunnel-er at my core. I will say that I feel like I should get some city gal points for city next to a homeless man with a straight face as he de-robed on the subway the other day. That's his home, who am I to judge?

I won't say that I'm giving up on the Long Islander in me, but I am suppressing her. I'm becoming one of those people who hustles across the streets of manhattan avoiding lights, looking like they know where they're going, and I've finally figured out how to tell the cardinal directions of the streets without holding my iPhone up in the air and praying for a signal. Progress? I'd say so.

I even find myself getting annoyed by Long Island sometimes. Like why are Metrocard machines so damn hard to find out there? There are buses! I actually hadn't left the boroughs since Thanksgiving before my mom's birthday on Sunday, and you know what? It didn't feel like it. Maybe the city's stuck in a time loop because I swear it felt like 2 weeks.

With that being said, this video helped me realize that the New Yorker in me has been coming out, full-force. To my followers  that aren't New Yorkers - what do you think? Unfortunately (and not unfortunately), this is exactly how a lot of New Yorkers are. It's kind of funny!

Next up: Valentine's Day

I am over joyed for Valentine's Day this year.

If you haven't noticed, I completely feed in to commercialized holidays. I like the idea, and them forcing you to spend time with your loved ones/friends to celebrate unnecessary spending. To me, it's only for a couple of days out of the year when (almost) everyone's mood is elevated because of all the love in the air.

Cheesey, fine. I can admit to that, but why not celebrate it? It shouldn't be once a year - it should be every day - but because this ONE day was singled out and you get to be surrounded around other sweethearts, just enjoy it. Even if you're single, I'm sure there are people around you who you love. Enjoy that. And if there's no one around you who you love, love yourself especially hard for the day.

Another reason I'm excited for Valentine's Day is because I can't wait to ball my eyes out for The Vow. I purposely try to provoke emotions out of myself so I'll go pay to see movies I know I'll be too scared to watch through open eyes and that are guaranteed to make me cry.  I have convinced J to take me to see this even though he's a regular guy who hates romance movies and this movie is like about 3 other Rachel McAdams movies I've seen before. 

Be honest, doesn't an itty bitty teeny tiny part of you kind of want to see this movie? 

You can thank Martin Luther King Jr. for this post

Well, you can. You can thank him for a lot of other things like being a major influence on the civil rights movement but for right now, as you're reading this, you can thank him for this update.

This long weekend I've been making great use of my time. Since I now have cable (moving on up in the world), I can now watch shows other than The Office and Charmed re-runs on Netflix, which I've been doing since about August. As it turns out, TV still sucks even after you give yourself a 5 month break from it.

Along with watching cable, I've been forcing my homebody boyfriend to explore the city. When I say "force", I mean gently but persistently encourage him. He's not a fan of crowds or public transportation, but I could really care less about that. If I'm living in a city, it's just something we've both got to get use to and so far he's been a good sport.

And another New Years resolution that I've been starting to work on is spending more time with my dad - who I don't talk about much on here. You hear about La Madre, which she loves because in her mind that makes her a celebrity, but my dad deserves shine too. This weekend J and I went on a "double date" with him and his womanfriend. You would think it would be awkward but it wasn't. . .just 4 adults talking and enjoying good food. Gahd, am I getting old? That statement sounded old.

I feel like  I spent so much of my life trying to get older and now that I'm in my 20's. . .I'd gladly give back like 2-3 years. There are obvious pros to being over 21 though. Still trying to figure those out.

Life Lessons

"The difference between school and life? In school you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life you're given a test and then taught a lesson".

- Tom Boddett

Such is life. 

I've been learning that a lot of people (okay, not a lot, but some) that I've hung out with high school and even in college still have a lot of growing up to do. I know that you're always learning and growing in life, but there should be a certain point when you reach a level of maturity that can make you admirable. A role model, even. Now I'm not saying "I have arrived" or anything, but I'm happy and proud of the place I am in life right now.  I think once you can accept and understand the above quote, you're getting there.

Making my way around

First of all - Happy New Year, my bloggies! I hope your year has been filled with less stress, no mess and lots of happiness so far. I know mine has.

I hate giving you all updates of my life and no real awesome stories to go along with it, so I apologize for that. Instead, I will give you photos that illustrate what I have been up to. Most people are visual learners, right?

Giving in to my mini-shopping addiction.

Spending time with those I absolutely adore and haven't seen in foreverrrr.

Going to Florida and seeing my sissy poo.

And her brother. My boo.

Relaxing in the sun while everyone else dealt with NY's bipolar weather.

Bottle poppin' and show stoppin'.

Celebrating 2011's end and 2012 beginning.

Finding my new favorite hangout.

Photographing some crazies.

Being "grown".

Celebrating a much needed break.

How have you all been spending your year so far? Keeping up with those resolutions, I hope. I'll be making my blogging rounds to visit you all - just give me some time! :)